The Saddest Facebook News Feed Item… Ever.

This afternoon I logged on to Facebook, and I saw my Mom had made a change to her Facebook Profile. She updated her relationship status. My dad passed away in June, for those of you just tuning in.

I’m not making a comment on my Mom or the fact that she changed it. I have no issue at all. It was just one of those weird moments that when I read it I was like “Aw, I’m going to cry. Mom changed her relationship status on Facebook.” It was one of those rediculously surreal moments - and at the same time snaps you back to that reality that Dad’s really gone on to Heaven.

What if Mom starts dating again? I mean, I’m not against the idea. I just wonder if my protective instinct will allow me to be accepting of her being romantically interested in someone besides my father. Probably will. I’m a pretty understanding guy, and I want Mom to be happy.

Father’s Day

In Loving Memory of Terry Howard Myers

June 7th, 1950 - June 8th, 2008

Happy Father’s Day, Dad.

Family Night Tonight

The family night for my dad’s passing is tonight. We’re having “Family Night” in lieu of a viewing, since Dad’s being cremated. We are borrowing an urn, since Dad is being shipped off to the crematory in a city near the beach and won’t be back until Thursday.

We were in the funeral home again today, which made me think I might cry, but I didn’t. We setup the pictures of dad, saw some of the flowers that had been sent already, and set out some of Dad’s Hot Wheels toy car collection and clown collection. Ironically, one of the funeral home workers is scared of clowns.

We picked out the urn to borrow - Mom originally selected an understated one with a bird on it, and I said “Mom, we’re not paying for it. We’re not even buying it. We’re borrowing it. If we can borrow any one of them, let’s borrow the most expensive one.” So we did. We picked up a really beautiful urn that was cast bronze and blue something or other, very ornate and heavy.

So far there are already three sets of flowers, and we’ve gotten lots of sympathy cards, text messages, e-mails, Facebook Messages and Wall Posts, MySpace messages,  blog comments, and in-home visitations. It’s always comforting to know people care, especially when you feel like falling down in a time like this.

The song “Let It Be,” the version from the Across the Universe soundtrack, makes me cry. Almost every time I play it. Dad likes the Beatles, so we’re going to play them tonight at family night. I’ve only got “Sargent Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band” and “Across the Universe” on CD here at my mom’s house, so that’s what we’re going to use.

A Great, But Hard Weekend

Last weekend I went back home to my folks’ house 5 hours from here. The primary purpose of the trip was to pick up my girl from her trip to visit her best friend, but also to visit my family for a short time over the weekend.

I arrived late Friday night, talked to my mom shortly and then passed out while fixing her desktop computer. It was  busy updating to Service Pack 3 for Windows XP, and it failed out because she has a 10 gig hard drive that filled up.

Saturday, I woke up late in the morning, went to Bojangles with my mom, then went to see my dad at the nursing home, and then went back to the house to wait on my girl to call. She and I and her friend Rachel went to IHOP (I wanted to write iHop there, I really think Apple has done something to my brain). After lunch/dinner, we went to the mall where I followed them around while they shopped.

Wound out the day by hanging out at her friend Rachel’s house, watching TV until late into the morning hours. I was supposed to return to my mom’s house after SNL (Saturday Night Live) was over, but me and my lovely girl got into a pretty crucial conversation that required attention, and I didn’t get home  until around 3:30 a.m. My mom was not pleased, and I apologized profusely for making her miss me all night. I got into bed around 4 a.m.

Sunday I was up again at 6:00 a.m. with a stomach ache and runny nose, and it was time to get ready for church anyway. I got ready, we left for church at 7 a.m., and I was completely sans-energy. I chugged an energy vitamin drink at breakfast as well as a diet Wild Cherry Pepsi (a side note: these are delicious! We don’t get them in my area, only the non-diet version, so I have to get them when I go home to visit). At church after the morning services, I stopped by the church’s coffee shop (yes, we have our own mini-Starbucks, serving actual Starbucks espresso) and got a mocha latte.

I was pretty awake finally by lunchtime. My mom took my grandma, sister, and me and my girlfriend-equivalent to Applebee’s and we all hung out. Then we left and went by the nursing home to see Dad on the way out of town. About six hours later we arrived at my house again, my body aching from no sleep. I almost completely passed out, but still stayed up till about 11pm watching TV. Kylara seemed to enjoy her presents that I got her while she was gone. I have my girl back for a while

Five Questions

1. What in your life brings you the most happiness?

Currently, I’m most happy when I’m around Kylara, followed by whenever I’m with my handful of good friends here in town or visiting my family. Music makes me happy. Knowing that Jesus loves me makes me happy - I just figured that’s a given and didn’t have to be listed first if you know me already.

2. What is one thing you had hoped to accomplish in life but
have not yet reached?

I want to be a professional writer. I’m in the process of figuring out how to get into graduate school and get a Master’s Degree in writing professionally. Maybe one day I’ll write for a technology blog or some other online publication. One day I also hope to publish multiple novels.

3. What is a hobby you enjoy and why?

I enjoy playing video games and board games and any other game that requires strategy and thought more than just random chance. The rules have to be fair and balanced, or at least openly stated in the beginning that there really are no standard rules, and therefore no winner or loser (such as 1,000 Blank White Cards).

4. You’re a talented writer. What is your favorite piece of your own writing? (Share it if you’re inclined).

A poem I wrote in High School called “Harvey is Dead,” or my goldfish-centric spy short story series, “Spy Fish.”

5. I know your upbringing was not all fun and games. If you are open to one day becoming a parent yourself, I imagine your experiences have given you resolve as to what kind of father you would hope to be. What attributes are you determined to exhibit as a father?

Well, I want to be clear. I love my parents and my dad is the right dad that God picked out for me. What I want to show my kids is all the good things I love about my dad, and the good things about my Heavenly dad.

I want them to know a love for music. I want them to know a love for books and writing. I want them to know they are loved and how to love others. I want them to know Jesus is Lord. I want them to know culture and history. I want them to know random facts in case they’re ever on Jeopardy.

I want them to know they can trust and depend on their father and mother. I want them to know their father loves their mother with  his whole heart. I want them to go “Ewwww” when there’s a kiss on the cheek between the two of us.

I want to be the kind of father that would do anything to keep his children safe and happy, as long as their happiness didn’t go against their well-being and healthiness.