The Raging Tech

Letters from Manuel

This morning I received an e-mail that said the following:

Manuel quiere que seas su amigo(a) en hi5.

He creado un perfil de hi5 y quisiera añadirte como un amigo, para que podamos compartir fotos y empezar a construir nuestra red. ¡Pero primero es necesario que te unas a hi5! Una vez que participes en el sitio, tendrás la oportunidad de crear un perfil, compartir imágenes, y encontrar muchos más amigos.

Gracias,
Manuel

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Wow.  Manuel wants something, and it sounds important. I recognized a few words: amigos, fotos, red. He must want photos of a red friend. I’m not sure what else he wants, but it sure is nice to have friends.

I wrote Manuel back:

Dear Manuel,

I can appreciate that you’d like photos of a red friend. Or maybe you wanted photos that would make a friend turn red. In either case, I think you’ve turned to the right guy. Unfortunately, my Spanish is very limited, and I’m not sure the phrases I know will come in handy in this situation. I mean, after all, donde’ estas el bano? Es la verdad! Donde’ estas la salade de atun, Manuel?! Que? Queso? Que Queso? No quiero queso, Manuel! Y El Pollo Diablo! Aye, Dios Mio!

As you can see, speaking Spanish only serves to infuriate me, so I will atempt no further. If you wish to remain friends with me, Manuel, you’ll have to learn some English. I fear if we do not break this language barrier, our relationship will become strained and I’ve only just met you. I can see that you are also friends with Luisa Fernanda, Yeliandra, Carmen, Marilu, Hermes, and Nena, and I’m sure that they’re all very nice people. Maybe we can all get together sometime and hang out.

Your Semi-Monolingual Friend,

The Raging Tech

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2.9

Tags: Culture, e-mail, humor

Good to Know: How Long Will You Survive in Space?

My results:

Congrats! You could survive for 1 minute 23 seconds !

In the first 30 seconds any fluid on the surface of your body would begin to boil due to lack of ambient pressure, this includes the saliva on your tongue and the moisture in your eyes. Your eardrums would most likely burst due to the pressure in your body trying to equalize with the vacuum outside. Unlike what some science fiction films have suggested, your body would not explode.

After the first 15 seconds you would lose consciousness. If you held your breath you could potentially stay alive longer but you risk pulmonary trauma. If you didn’t hold your breath you’d pass out sooner, but your lungs might have a better chance of avoiding permanent damage.

The pressure in your veins would rise until your heart no longer had the capacity to pump blood, at which point you’d die.

OnePlusYou Quizzes and Widgets

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2.5

Tags: boredom, Entertainment, humor, quizzes

Chad Vader: Day Shift Manager

I totally thought I’d written about this before, but I couldn’t find one single post on this blog about Chad Vader, the Day Shift manager. If you like shows like “The Office” or “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia,” you’ll love this classic YouTube series whose basic premise is - what if Darth Vader’s cousin worked at a grocery store instead of commanding a Death Star?

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2.5

Tags: Chad Vader, humor, series, Star Wars, YouTube